Ramblings and Babblings

 Alhamdulillah... Somehow today - around the point after i wrote the first post on this blog - i felt a slow, but certain upturn in my mood. It felt like something that has been blocking my brainwave and ability to think cleared up slowly, but surely. There was a sense of positivity seeping into my mood, overcoming the usual cloud of fear and anxiety that usually engulfs me. Alhamdulillah - i can’t be certain as yet what has resulted in this recent improvements, but I am grateful nevertheless.  Perhaps it is the writing, or the diet. Or maybe the tv show that i watched today. Or the exercise that I did this morning with the group of PTA members. But surely, this is a shower of continued blessings from Allah, and I am grateful and keen to keep this positivity up. Let’s keep on writing, and keep on dreaming. A shower of thoughts have come upon me since i wrote earlier today, and more has come. I do hope this will be a start to positive changes, especially in light of the recent ...

 Hiii.... Hello hellloooo.... it has been a while since i put words on anything, aside from the requirements that come with work. You know - emails, memos, boards papers etc and stuffs. It has been so long that it almost feels like whatever inside me is already dead. It has been so quiet I am not sure if i have any voice inside me anymore. It seems like i have just chosen to go through the motions with no fuss - to just follow the pace of others, and do what people expect of me - that my inner voice, my conscience has just finally shut down. Today i decided to open this page and make an attempt to write. Not to anyone in particular. But to myself.  Hi there selfie... you there? Come out now will you.. I want to feel alive again, to not be afraid anymore. To just be bold and do what I wanted to do. To feel alive and real. To feel... It is a start... let’s call this self therapy and see where this takes us. What’s happened of late, what with the lockdown, the stresses of work, t...